Cross-border couple wants to reunite for Christmas, but are at 'mercy of the process'

Kathryn Shuel, who lives in Essex, Ont., and Corey Kootsillas, who lives in Michigan, haven't seen each other since March.

The couple of nearly 14 years are hoping to reunite for the holidays after being apart for several months, but say they're still waiting for approval from the federal government.

They said they first applied to be reunited on compassionate grounds in October and were told they would get a response within 14 business days. They were rejected because Kootsillas, a delivery driver, did not qualify because he couldn't fulfil the 14-day quarantine requirement.

That has since changed after he got into an accident and broke his hip. Now that Kootsillas is able to quarantine for two weeks, the couple reapplied, but were met with roadblocks. 

They were told they didn't provide enough documentation to support they've been in a relationship for at least a year.

"That was kind of a blow," Shuel said. "At that point, we came up with more information. We found some travel documents from 2011, from a trip we took. We found photos from Facebook with date stamps, anything we could come up with.

"We then also included his doctors information so that we could show that he would be able to stay in Canada for the length of time that we needed."

They filed their paperwork again on Nov. 30, Shuel said, adding that she was told the length of time to review applications has been extended to 21 days.

So, just days away from Christmas, they're still waiting to hear back.

"We're at the mercy of the process," said Kootsillas.

"It's pretty frustrating because just the fact that I have to continue to try and justify my relationship with the man who, over the course of the past 10 years, has been crossing the border every Friday and going home every Monday consistently," Shuel said.

"We cross together. We are both Nexus card holders."

She said it's been difficult to only connect with her fiancé virtually.

"I guess we're lucky in that we get Skype and Zoom and things like this, but there is no way that it's the same. There is nothing like getting a hug and some emotional support," she said.

"We're all going through a pandemic here, all of us, but I don't get to have that support from ... the love of my life."

'There's no end date'

Kootsillas agrees, adding that the pandemic has been extra challenging without his loved ones.

"The person you look to the most to lean on is your partner, your family, your kids, your step-kids. It just makes it extra tough because we aren't able to do that," he said.

"One of the hardest things about this whole situation is there's no end date.... They extended the border closure another month, another month, another month," he said. "Not knowing when you're going to be able to be together again, it's really tough. It's like there's no ending."

While cases of COVID-19  are rising across the region, the couple believes the visit can be done safely.

"I'm more than happy to come over there and quarantine for my 14 days because I'm not looking to come over there and risk my family getting sick," Kootsillas said. "I don't think there would be a high risk for me to go to one house and stay there for 14 days."

He said they're not the only ones facing a similar situation. He said they're part of a group online where "many couples, like myself and Kathryn, that are in the same position."

• Other cross-border couples have faced the same dilemma of not being able to see their significant others during the pandemic.

Kathryn Shuel's 15-year-old daughter, Julia Shuel, said it's also been tough on her to not be able to see Kootsillas for nine months.

"I've always admired him as a second dad.... But since quarantine actually began, all we got to do was contact each other via messenger," Julie said.

"We got to talk to each other via phone call, text messages, but not getting to see him in person breaks my heart. I don't get to see my second dad."

May not reunite for Christmas

"The holidays just all also reminds you of family, you know," Kathryn said. "Corey and I, we both lost our moms. I've also lost my dad. Corey is my family."

"We should be together to support each other through this pandemic. We should be together to support each other at the holidays."

She said they're coming to terms with not be able to reunite for Christmas.

"I have to be tough enough to face the reality that we may not be able to see each other for a little longer and there's nothing I can do. I mean, Julia and I will keep soldiering on," Kathryn said.

CBC News reached out to the federal government for comment, but hasn't received a response yet.