Why this 89-year-old has kept a diary since the late 1970s

Each morning, Ruby Cousins wakes up and makes a pot of tea before sitting down at her kitchen table to write about the events of the previous day.

While the entries were "hit and miss" for a few years, Cousins says she's been taking part in this morning ritual since 1978.

The 89-year-old prefers this method to recording her thoughts at the end of each day because she believes it encourages her to reflect more deeply.

"And it goes right up until this morning," she said, "I think keeping records is a way of keeping sharp." 

Cataloguing life's events

She's got one rule to help her stay consistent: her diary never leaves the kitchen table. 

"If I keep it any place else in the house I'll neglect it, probably." 

Over in the dining room, a pile of diaries lay on the dining room table. They span decades, cataloguing her life's events — everything from trips to the births of grandchildren to more challenging moments, like illnesses and deaths.

You want to keep those things alive.— Ruby Cousins

"Most precious of all are the entries that I made about the grandchildren. They are hilarious."

In one entry, Cousins writes about an endearing exchange with her grandson.

"He asked me how come I had a dimple in my elbow and he said, 'Grandma, most people have dimples in their cheeks.'

"And I replied, 'Well when you get old you have dimples, you have black marks, you have wrinkles on your face and all that.' And he said, 'Well that's how come you must be older than Mummy, because you have wrinkles and she doesn't.'"

'Dark and dreary'

In the sea of diaries at edge of the dining room table is a black book, dated 1997.

"The nature of the stories in the 1997 one are kind of dark and dreary and sad because 1997 was the year my husband passed away."

Cousins and her husband Maurice got married in 1951. They were married for 46 years.

"It was also the same year that Princess Diana passed," she said.

"So that's my sad book … and it's black, the only one that's black."

The nature of the stories in the 1997 one are kind of dark and dreary and sad.— Ruby Cousins

Toward the middle of the table is bright yellow diary, which keeps record of a trip to Costa Rica with her sister-in-law in 2009 during which a volcano erupted.

It's as if each diary possesses a unique personality or quality, distinct from its companions.

Ruby's secret code

Over the years, Cousins has developed a kind of code in her diary-keeping, so as to protect her thoughts from potential prying eyes.

"When I keep a diary, I never make an entry that I'll be sorry for. Rather than say something nasty about someone, I might add a little something at the end of their name." 

It's to pass on information to your family, that's the important thing of them.— Ruby Cousins

If someone she's interacted with was particularly unpleasant, she might write the word attitude beside their name or down at the edge of the entry.

If there are two exclamation marks on an entry, she said, it typically suggests something juicy happened that day.

"I can remember but nobody else can."

Cousins said she's found immense value in keeping a record of the precious, the funny and even the banal moments of everyday life, "They're everything."

Keeping history alive

Keeping diaries has also led to a passion for keeping track of her family's history.

Cousins has stacks of scrapbooks she's compiled over the years, tracing the lives of her family members through pictures, news clippings and even obituaries.

She's also clocked some serious time at the Public Archives and Records Office in Charlottetown, hunched over yellowed documents in pursuit of her family's past.

"There's operations, there's people who have passed on, there's just everything. When you go to do a family history you definitely turn to a diary," she said.

"If I didn't have those diaries to go to, it would be forgotten. You want to keep those things alive ... I would tell anyone, 'If you have a diary, don't dare throw them out.'"

Cousins hopes her diaries can serve as a sort of legacy for her own family.

"It's something to leave for family. I'm hoping that they will not be pitched when I'm gone and I hope they will keep them and read them," she said.

"I think it's to pass on information to your family, that's the important thing." 

The newest addition to her diary collection is a purple, grey and white book. In black marker, it's already been dated with the year 2020. 

It sits on her kitchen table, where it'll sit for the next year — its pages waiting to be filled.

More from CBC P.E.I.