N.L. couple fighting for more time together after terminal diagnosis

A couple in Newfoundland and Labrador find themselves searching desperately for ways to make the most of their limited time together due to a devastating medical diagnosis. 

John Cossar, a St. John's musician, was recently diagnosed with terminal cancer. Now he and his wife, Sandy, are fighting for every second together — and have discovered that the sky-high cost of living is standing firmly in their way.

The Cossars met later in life. In the mornings, Sandy would get breakfast at a neigbourhood Tim Hortons, where John worked as a baker.

She did not learn of his musical talent until listening to a interview with him on CBC Radio.

She decided to attend his album launch, struck at how she could relate to each song he played. After the show, she wanted to get him to sign her CD.

"He was bent over to sign my name, and I said, 'By the way, you just sang my life,'" said Sandy Cossar. "He said, 'Would you like to have a coffee sometime and talk about that?'"

She agreed, and after that coffee, the pair became inseparable, spending the last 11 years together.

'Someone seriously needs to give their head a shake'

While the pair have had quite a journey, they have been forced to come to terms with the fact that their time together is limited.

John has been battling incurable cancer for years, but was recently told that he has about one year to live. As his condition gradually worsens, the couple has been trying to find a way for Sandy to become his caretaker. 

Sandy, a housekeeper, says her own health problems have rendered her unable to work as regularly as in the past. 

"I can't work as much as I used to," said Sandy. "I don't know what we're going to do financially, because if I can't work, we only have his [Canada Pension Plan] and Old Age [Security.] That's not enough money to live on in today's economy."

Sandy says she applied to a caregiver's benefit program through employment insurance but was turned down.

Her last resort was social services, she said.

"I've done my part, I've paid my taxes," Sandy said. "A few months ago, I was not feeling well at all. I called up and they said, 'We're sorry, but you make too much money.'"

Officials explained that her husband's CPP and Old Age Security payments put them above the threshold to be eligible for payment.

"I worked my whole life," said Sandy Cossar. "My husband, who also worked his whole life and is entitled to his pension, now has to support a 55-year-old woman? [There's] something wrong with that, in my opinion."

John says, the situation defies logic, pointing to a friend who works as a caregiver, who offered to look after him so his wife could return to work, while her own husband requires care.

"She can't stay home and look after [her husband], but she can go out and work as a caretaker and get paid. Sandy also has the option to go to her house and look after her husband and get paid for it. But she can't stay here and get paid to look after me. 

"Somebody seriously needs to give their head a shake."

'I don't want to miss a minute'

Having been eligible for the Canada emergency response benefit payments during the pandemic, Sandy said her wish is for the provincial government to recognize some of the benefits that came from the program and implement something similar.

"My fantasy is that the government is going to flip a switch and give everybody universal basic income," said Sandy Cossar.

"That would solve everything. The CERB solved everything at the time. That should have shown the government that there are people falling behind. They must know we're living in poverty. If I was getting even $1,000 from a universal basic income, we could live on that while he's dying. I don't want to be away cleaning someone's house while my husband is home dying with cancer."

It's "the human thing to do," added John.

"Politicians might not realize it, but we're all going to die," he said. "Somewhere down the road, the system [they] set up is the one [they're] going to have to live through as well."

Despite the challenges they face, the Cossars are spending their time simply enjoying each other's company while they can. They smile, they laugh, play music, and are hoping to record some new songs that John has written.

"If I were to kick the bucket now, in a year from now, the last 10,11 years have been absolutely amazing," said John.

AUDIO | John and Sandy Cossar discuss their struggle

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