'It means the world': Why peer support is crucial for those struggling with eating disorders
New student-run program at McGill emphasizes active listening in one-on-one or group setting
Tristan Surman's struggle with an eating disorder began with a dream to become a singer. To realize that dream, he felt he needed to fit a certain image.
"I remember looking at someone like Justin Bieber, or the guys in One Direction, and being like, I want to look like that. I have to look like that if I want to do the thing I love."
His obsession turned into extreme dieting and then, eventually, bulimia.
One night, Surman went to sleep with a gnawing hunger, feeling proud about how hungry he was. When he woke up, he could barely see in front of him.
Surman thought something was wrong with his eyes, but the doctor said that wasn't the case.
"He was like, you have to eat something," Surman said.
Surman got some help from a therapist, a patchwork of doctors and a dietitian after that — but he says he didn't really begin processing his disorder until he was able to share his experience with a friend who had also struggled.
"I'd never had support like that. It means the world. I don't know how to quantify the impact of empathy, but it's not trivial."
Jérôme Tremblay, clinical co-ordinator at Anorexia and Bulimia Quebec (ANEB), says peer support can help those struggling with an eating disorder take a big step in their recovery.
"It can help break the silence surrounding the disease, and it helps a lot with breaking the loneliness of living with that disease," Tremblay said.
"Breaking the silence is the most important step toward recovery, I would say."
Hear Tristan tell his story:
Open to everyone
A new student-run peer support program at McGill provides that support for Montrealers.
The peer support program, run by McGill's student society's eating disorder resource and support centre, is open to everyone. It consists of two different services: drop-in, one-on-one peer services, available Tuesdays and Fridays, or a support group, where people can share their own experiences and hear the experiences of others.
The conversation is facilitated by volunteers who are trained using a manual created by the students with the help of various mental health professionals.
It covers information about eating disorders, about how to be an active listener and how to be supportive.
Sunny Katseva, 22, works at the centre. She said the program is not the same as getting professional help — it can be used in conjunction with other services, like conventional therapy.
As a teenager, Katseva was hospitalized once for being dangerously underweight. She said during her struggle with an eating disorder, she felt shut off from the rest of the world.
"I couldn't go out with people because there is usually food involved, or drinks. I always shut down any invitations to go out or socialize," she said.
Katseva said she waited more than a year to receive services at the Douglas Institute's eating disorder program. Currently, the average wait time to get into the program is 105 days, according to the regional health authority (CIUSSS de l'Ouest-de-l'Île-de-Montréal).
She said for years, she struggled alone, thinking she had to do everything on her own — until she started getting support from her peers.
"I was amazed at how much help that was, having someone you trust and know tell you this thing you're experiencing is valid and I'm sorry that you're going through this, but I'm here with you. I'm going to support you, and we're going to get through this together."
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