I struggled to tell my racialized daughter that we're descended from slave owners
Even though I was a history teacher, I wasn’t prepared for what I found in our family records
This First Person article is written by Kael Sharman, who lives in Windsor, Ont. For more information about CBC's First Person stories, please see the FAQ.
As a history teacher, I urge my students to connect their family stories to what they learn in class. In my experience, education sinks in better when it's anchored to something of personal interest. The problem is that many students don't know much detail about their family histories. And until recently, neither did I.
To set an example for my students, I dove into my family's genealogical records and historical archives. My parents told me that many of my ancestors immigrated to Canada in the 1600s. My mother's side is predominantly French-Canadian, going back to the first Acadian settlers. My father's side is primarily Scottish and English, although there was also some Dutch ancestry. We also knew my paternal grandfather's family had immigrated from the United States.
Nothing prepared us for learning we're descended from the Vrooman family, a rough bunch of cunning businesspeople. In particular, one person stood out: Adam Vrooman, a British Loyalist and slave owner in the 18th century. He also happens to be my distantly related great-uncle or second cousin, six times removed.
In 1793, Vrooman forcibly brought Chloe Cooley, an African enslaved woman, from what was then known as Upper Canada to the United States in an attempt to sell her. Cooley's resistance to his cruel treatment and the outrage of those who witnessed it resulted in "An Act to Limit Slavery," a law that was introduced that year and began the decade-long process of ending slavery in Canada.
It goes without saying that slavery is inhumane and that I was horrified to learn about our family history. But I also don't want to hide the fact that I'm the great-nephew of Adam Vrooman. Shame warrants secrecy and damages self-acceptance of our pasts. It feels much healthier to acknowledge and share my ancestors' involvement in the "Cooley Incident."
But that was easier said than done.
It felt wrong to share only Cooley's story of resilience and resistance with her, because if I left out the role of my own family, I would be complicit in keeping up the defensive walls built by shame. Understanding our history can help us understand who we are and eventually lead to healing. We need that as a country, and I want that for my daughter and myself.
I had to remind myself that if her family history includes Adam Vrooman, it also includes, more importantly, Chloe Cooley as part of her national history.
WATCH | The making of the Heritage Minutes video on slavery in Upper Canada:
In the same way documented colonialism assists me in understanding my settler past, a history that includes women like Chloe Cooley will hopefully help my daughter see herself reflected in the stories of Black Canadians. She says she'd rather know our family history, but she often feels discouraged because Black history remains woefully undocumented.
Cooley's resistance ensured her name, and agency, was witnessed and recorded. But when I tried to find the names of other people my ancestors were responsible for enslaving, it was next to impossible. Early records for ship manifests, exchanges, and government census were not detailed with the names of enslaved people, and instead, they were usually referred to in general derogatory terms, if at all.
My daughter is why I keep researching and trying to uncover their names.
Today, I feel like I'm a better history teacher because I'm more personally invested in the need for a nuanced story. There are still students unaware that slavery existed in Canada, and racialized students need to see themselves in national narratives not just as victims, but also as agents of resistance and change. I also feel like a better parent, because talking openly about our family history has brought my daughter and I closer together.
It has been a difficult and emotional process getting to that place, but it feels worth the effort. That's why I encourage everyone to talk about the good, bad and ugly truths with your families. We owe it to ourselves, and our children.
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For more stories about the experiences of Black Canadians — from anti-Black racism to success stories within the Black community — check out Being Black in Canada, a CBC project Black Canadians can be proud of.
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